COLD HARD NINJA FACTS!
- Ninja don't sweat. Ever.
- Bullets can't kill a ninja. Even 1 million bullets can not kill a ninja.
- The Fart of a Ninja is a million times deadlier than the venom of a rattlesnake. With the right wind conditions, a single fart could wipe out a small village.
- Ninja invented skateboarding. Not even to do tricks, just to kill time in between killing.
- Only a ninja can kill a ninja. Regular humans are useless against a ninja.
- Ninja never wear headbands with the word "ninja" printed on them. This is a lie from Hollywood.
- Ninja can breath underwater anytime they want.
- Ninja can change complete wardrobes in less than 1 second.
- Ninja don't smoke, but they do use smoke bombs.
- Ninja always land on their feet. If they don't have feet they will land on their nubs.
- Ninja invented the internet. All of it.
- Ninja don't eat or drink very much, and they never have to go to the bathroom.
- Ninja always move to America when making a new start as a non-assassin.
- Ninja don't play sports. Unless killing is a sport. They always win.
- Ninja can crush golf balls with 2 fingers, any two fingers.
- Ninja don't lose. Ever.
- Ninja lie all the time. Even when the truth serves better, ninja will lie anyway.
- Ninja swords are always straight with a square handle guard. Always. Curves are for girls.